{"id":6890,"date":"2015-08-29T13:55:14","date_gmt":"2015-08-29T13:55:14","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/whatliesbeneathrattlechainlagoon.org.uk\/?p=6890"},"modified":"2015-08-29T13:55:14","modified_gmt":"2015-08-29T13:55:14","slug":"toms-bomb","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/whatliesbeneathrattlechainlagoon.org.uk\/?p=6890","title":{"rendered":"Tom’s bomb"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"S3600023\"<\/a><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

There was a boy whose name was Tom,<\/span><\/strong>
\n Who made a high explosive bomb,<\/span><\/strong>
\n By mixing up some iodine<\/span><\/strong>
\n With sugar, flour and plasticine<\/span><\/strong>
\n Then, just to make it smell more queer<\/span><\/strong>
\n He added Daddy’s home-made beer.<\/span><\/strong>
\n He took it off to school one day<\/span><\/strong>
\n And when they all went out to play,<\/span><\/strong>
\n He left it by the radiator<\/span><\/strong>
\n As the heat was getting greater<\/span><\/strong>
\n The mixture in the bomb grew thick<\/span><\/strong>
\n And very soon it seemed to tick<\/span><\/strong>
\n Miss Knight came in and gazed with awe<\/span><\/strong>
\n To see the bomb upon the floor<\/span><\/strong>
\n “Dear me”, she said “it is a bomb,<\/span><\/strong>
\n An object worth escaping from”<\/span><\/strong>
\n She went to Mr Holliday<\/span><\/strong>
\n And said in tones that were not gay,<\/span><\/strong>
\n “Headmaster, this is not much fun<\/span><\/strong>
\n There is a bomb in classroom one!”<\/span><\/strong>
\n “Great snakes” said he, and gave a cough<\/span><\/strong>
\n And said, “I hope it won’t go off!<\/span><\/strong>
\n But on the off chance that it does<\/span><\/strong>
\n I think we’d better call the Fuzz”<\/span><\/strong>
\n A policeman came and said, “Oh, God,<\/span><\/strong>
\n We need the bomb disposal squad<\/a><\/span><\/strong>
\n Some firemen<\/a> and a doctor<\/a> too,<\/span><\/strong>
\n A helicopter and its crew<\/span><\/strong>
\n And, since I’m shaking in the legs<\/span><\/strong>
\n A cup of tea and hard boiled eggs!”<\/span><\/strong>
\n A bomb disposal engineer<\/span><\/strong>
\n Said, with every sign of fear,<\/span><\/strong>
\n “I’ve not seen one like that before,”<\/span><\/strong>
\n And rushed out, screaming, through the door.<\/span><\/strong>
\n Everyone became more worried<\/span><\/strong>
\n Till Tom, who seemed to be unflurried<\/span><\/strong>
\n Asked what was all the fuss about?<\/span><\/strong>
\n “I’ll pick it up and take it out.”<\/span><\/strong>
\n He tipped the contents down the drain<\/span><\/strong>
\n And peace and quiet reigned again<\/span><\/strong>
\n Tom just smiled and shook his head<\/span><\/strong>
\n And quietly to himself he said:<\/span><\/strong>
\n “Excitement’s what these people seek,<\/span><\/strong>
\n I’ll bring another one next week!”<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

David Hornsby<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

\"scan0037\"<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

  There was a boy whose name was Tom, Who made a high explosive bomb, By mixing up some iodine With sugar, flour and plasticine Then, just to make it smell more queer He added Daddy’s home-made beer. He took … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/whatliesbeneathrattlechainlagoon.org.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6890"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/whatliesbeneathrattlechainlagoon.org.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/whatliesbeneathrattlechainlagoon.org.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/whatliesbeneathrattlechainlagoon.org.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/whatliesbeneathrattlechainlagoon.org.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=6890"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/whatliesbeneathrattlechainlagoon.org.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6890\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":6894,"href":"https:\/\/whatliesbeneathrattlechainlagoon.org.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6890\/revisions\/6894"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/whatliesbeneathrattlechainlagoon.org.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=6890"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/whatliesbeneathrattlechainlagoon.org.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=6890"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/whatliesbeneathrattlechainlagoon.org.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=6890"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}